It’s been a while since our daughter left Dubai to study in the Philippines for her college. I still remember the days she would beg us not to send her back home but we had to be practical. Besides, the educational system in the Philippines is better. So we had to make the painful decision of sending her home. Many years after, and a lot have changed. Our daughter doesn’t want to come back. Whatever happened to those pleading looks, and teary requests? I guess, people do change, and I am sure, a lot of factors changed her mind to come back here. Whatever they are, I am not amused.

Photo by Anthony Tran on Unsplash

Empty nesters. I thought we wouldn’t reach this status until we are in our mid or late 50s. But here we are, facing day by day without our daughter here in Dubai. My heart is tugged a lot of times but I don’t want to force her when has already made up her mind.

Being an empty nester is a new and not a thrilling experience for me and my husband. We were used to going out as family. We had to adjust when she left for Manila. I don’t know if my husband has fully embraced the fact that our daughter doesn’t want to stay here but if you will ask me – nope. I am not thrilled. I don’t like it. I feel lonely.

Much as I enjoy the quiet time of being able to do things on my own terms and time and without having to attend non-stop PTA’s of my daughter while she was in school here, I enjoyed those moments. I loved attending school events. I was there every single Parent-Teachers Association meetings. Every. Single. One. Of. Them. Now, I just dilly dally on most stuff. It’s as if I have lost the structure of my life, my being a mother.

I miss the times I have to stay up very late to help her with her project. I miss the waking up very, very early to help finish her assignment and stuff. I miss the times I had to spare few hours of my day to review her with her lessons before I could go on blogging. I cooked while she was here. I was a functional human being. I am not sure about that now.

Empty nester. The first word does make sense. That’s how I feel. EMPTY.

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