I am a tough cookie at work. I can be unyielding and difficult at times because that’s the kind of hat I wear in the office. However, it’s very different at home especially when I have to deal with my own daughter.

My daughter is back in my home country for her collegiate studies. I don’t have 24/7 “eyes” on her anymore and letting her go out with friends every now and then may seem like a far cry from how I would normally give my permission when she was here; today’s drama was different.

My daughter bought a ticket for the advance screening of a wholesome, family-oriented movie to be shown soon in Manila. It’s an exclusive offer to all La Sallians. So, without consulting me, she bought a ticket. You may ask me now, “what seems to be the problem with that?” And my response will be – THE TIMING!

Dubai and Manila cannot be compared in terms of safety and security. My daughter is used to the lifestyle here where she can stay up late until 10 p.m. with her friends malling, attending Comic Con, group studies, project-making, etc. So you see, I am quite lenient with her when she was still here because it’s safer and more secure. She’d call us to be picked up at the nearest train station which is only 5 minutes away from our home by car. And in Manila? The movie screening is at MOA and it will start at 7PM! Yes, I know MOA is near La Salle but she lives very far from that place. She will have to take the LRT and by the time the premier is over, it will be super late, the train station might be closed and how many more commuters will be out during that time? No, I can’t risk that and certainly I won’t let her.

I do appreciate the fact that my daughter informed me but she already decided on her own to buy the ticket thinking I would approve of that. Attending the movie premier IS NOT AN ISSUE but the time in which it will be shown is my greatest issue.

I had to say no after a lengthy exchange of messages in FB chat. I had to explain to her why and that it wasn’t worth risking her safety even if she will be commuting with 3 other friends. The crux of the matter is, they are all young and not used to the life in the Philippines. No, I just can’t let her commute so late and the travel distance is another story.

She decided to have the ticket refunded instead and she would do it tomorrow. I feel so gutted. If she only knows how bad I feel inside to not allow her.  I know it’s something she really, really wanted. There are things that I cannot compromise and that is her safety and security.

I even told her I’ll pay her for the ticket but she politely declined my offer. I know she felt bad but I hope she’d be sensible enough to realize it’s not because I don’t want to but the factors of safety and security are my primary concerns. I hope she understood me on that matter. She should know better! I always tell her about life back home based on the news we read and watch. She should know that this is not for myself. I had allowed her to attend a Comic Con last October while we were there and I didn’t even questioned her on that because it was only until afternoon. You see, if the movie premier was to end around 7PM, I might re-consider.

It’s not easy to say no especially when it means you’ll quel something that can make your kid happy. On the other hand, as a parent, you know for a fact that what you’re doing is for your kid’s safety and security and you’ll do everything you can to ensure they are safe. And that’s what’s running in my head and heart. I don’t like saying no to her. It’s not easy and it breaks my heart into million pieces to do that but I have to because I know it’s the right thing.




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